Happy Holidays, Everyone!

Hey everyone! It's Christmas Eve! I don't about all y'all, but I remember the good ol' days when I would stay up for hours waiting and watching for "Santa Claus", a.k.a. Coolio de Santio, to come squeezing through the bathroom fan (the less popular of choices for the Jolly Red Elf) and leave the much anticipated booty for my sibs and I to sort through at 3:30 in the morning. Now, as we all know, there are some presents which I affectionately will call, "thought presents", after all, it is the thought that counts right? *insert evil snicker at you here if you agree with the statement made above... Loser*
Ah, dearest family, as much and as hard as I try, I am just not a size XXXL, so no matter how hard I try, I won't fit into the "too much teddy bear for you to handle" shirt you got me... Nor will I fit into those cute tasmanian devil slippers made for someone in their 30's. (and yet I can barely squeeze into 'em... The first day.) [You know what they say about guys with big feet right? They have big shoes. Oooooh ya.]
Stepping away from all the cliches and commercialism now, Christmas is really about one thing... Christ. Gasp, yes, I said it. You may be able to keep it from our schools, from our government, and from some people's minds, but it's the truth. He died for us, but even more importantly, he lived for us.
Happy Birthday, Lord.

On a more serious note...

Hey everyone. I know I've kind been lazy on the bloggin', (Michelle and Brooke have been kind enough to remind me, over and over and over...) so I'm gonna try a little harder to keep in touch with everyone. Ok? Ok.
Well, I just wanted to take a second to shout from the tops of the Blogging Mountains that I am so grateful that I have knowledge of the true and living gospel. Without the daily guidance of the spirit and the blessings that come from obedience to that spirit, I would be lost and gone forever, swallowed in a black sea of doubt and ignorance. In connection with this, I am also extremely grateful for the company on which I associate myself with on a daily basis.
My friends, you rock!
Seriously, I love you all.
And don't you ever forget it.

Maybe a little music to set the mood...

I thought my blog could use a little ambiant music.
Enjoy! (I know Brooke will)

Who Will Win "The Challenge"?

SQUIRRELS... FROSTED GOLDEN APPLE SCRAPS... AN AARDVARK JAMMING TO THE SWEET SOUNDS OF THE JACKSON 5... BEEF...

ATTENTION ALL!!! This challenge goes out to anyone who happens to read my blog. Your mission... Create a written masterpiece that uses all of the above phrases at least 1.5 times. It can be a story, a poem, or a haiku. It really doesn't matter!

Ready?
GO!

*WARNING!*
Reading the above may cause upset stomachs, headaches, earaches, just plain aches, various pains, hallucinations, sprouting fur, puberty, baked goods to be hurled in your general direction, little green men to appear and take you away to a far off land where the only you can do is fight evil in a never ending battle for your life, that one vain on your forehead to come "bursting forth", and various other forms of "bursting". Do not take if you're pregnant, plan on becoming pregnant, plan on having a social life, plan on having a soul after you die, plan to eat peanut butter straight from the jar, plan on planning, have ever seen an elephant fly, have ever had the word "cakeman" tattooed on your arm, have ever said the word "cakeman", or if you have ever dressed up as a rabid carebear and gone on a rampage.